Farmgirl Follies

Meet the boys

Posted by Farmgirl on February 26, 2009  |  2 Comments

Need a smile? Allow me to introduce my nephews … Mack and Grady. These sweet little peas belong to my sister. One looks like Daddy, one looks like Mommy, and side-by-side they look alike. It’s uncanny. And miraculous … darling … precious … adorable … throw in any appropriate adjective.

I have to admit, I can’t imagine two babies at once … but my sister, she’s wonder woman. She had six nieces and nephews to practice on, I’ll admit. Still—a natural.

The crazy broad actually invited my three kids over to make Valentine cut-out cookies. She brought homemade donuts to Sunday dinner. The babies were born three days shy of Christmas and she still managed to make cookie trays (and I mean several trays with several kinds of cookies and candies) for the neighbors, friends and family.

And you know what really bugs me? She’s calm. Oh sure, now she’s had a couple of months to settle in. From the get-go, though, she was calm. I remember my first baby. I poked and prodded and pestered that kid so much it’s no wonder she had a scream fest every night from 8-10 p.m. And what did I do to make her stop crying? I fed her. And I fed her some more. Speaking of feedings, not only is my sister the world’s greatest new mother, she’s a milk-makin’ machine!

Don’t be embarrassed, dear sister. I proudly, at this very moment, give you a standing ovation. You are a phenomenal mother. You always were a phenomenal aunt. In fact, from this day forward, your nickname here at Farmgirl Follies shall be PheMom. That’s farm girl speak for phenomenal mom.

There’s a goat in the henhouse…

Posted by Farmgirl on February 26, 2009  |  1 Comment

There’s a goat in the henhouse and two very angry girls.

Biotech at its best

Posted by Farmgirl on February 26, 2009  |  1 Comment

In case you don’t know, GMO stands for genetically modified organism. Corn and soy are the top two genetically modified crops. There are all kinds of genetically engineered products on the market. Whether you agree or disagree with the marvels of modern science, you must admit there are some great products available.

Take for instance my box of Puffs brand tissues. (Side note: never call your tissue a Kleenex unless it is, in fact, a Kleenex brand tissue. It’s like saying you Xeroxed a document. Unless it’s a Xerox brand copy machine, you actually copied your document.)

Back to my tissues. Because I am not a scientist, I cannot say for sure whether this new, enhanced product was, in fact, genetically engineered. I will say it is a fabulous invention. It smells like Vicks! Are you familiar with Vicks? I love it. I could sniff it for days. It’s the scent of heaven, the scent of everything that is good, and pure and congestion-free. I love Vicks. I am a Vicks-aholic. And when I stuffed my drippy, runny, snot-filled nostrils into my new Vicks-scented Puffs tissue, I was in total bliss. And no longer congested, as a matter of fact.

Sick people do not take award-winning photos.

Vicks-scented tissues. Talk about cross promotions! Talk about branding! Brilliant!

Speaking of Vicks, my kids hate it. They think it burns. NOW, those brainiacs at the Vicks company make Vicks Baby Rub. It’s Vicks, without the burn power … although it doesn’t burn, it invigorates!

Vicks is not paying me to proclaim its wonders, but I shall hark its heralds far and near. Probably because every person in my family is suffering from chest-nose-throat-and-ear congestion and good ol’ Vicks is the cure for it all. I know, I could go to the doctor and get a bunch of medicine for all of us … but we’re hardy folks. And now that Vicks has partnered with Puffs with or without lotion, we’ll be ok!

CAUTION: Slow-moving {projects} ahead

Posted by Farmgirl on February 26, 2009  |  1 Comment

“What’s the delay?” you ask. “Where are the photos of the commode resting serenely on its new tile floor?”

You know what they say about best laid plans … and perfectionist husbands! — oh wait, they don’t say that part. But I do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m GLAD farm boy went online to read the fine points of tile grouting only to discover that slate tiles are particularly tricky and for best results, you must seal the tile else the grout will stick and you’ll be scrubbing forever.

But. It takes three coats of sealer, which need six hours of dry time in between and then 24 hours of dry time between coat #3 and grout #1. And well … yes, that is the delay. I just finished coat #3 of this silly tile sealer. I hope to have photos of my new floor soon. I say soon, because you never know what might happen between now and my prescribed grouting window.

For instance, I could have accomplished sealer coat #2 last evening, but at 6:42 p.m. I remembered the Ash Wednesday service at church. We made it to our seats in the sanctuary at 7:01 p.m. Whew. Last ones in, first ones out, but hey, it was moving, memorable and humbling. I’m glad we went.

I’m giving up my temper for Lent. I am making a conscious effort not to become instantly distraught at the sight of crumbled orange peanut butter crackers on my just-swept rug or spilled milk on my living room carpet. I promise to just smile and remember these are the good ‘ol days and some future day I’ll look back on these silly things and grin. Right?

Of course.

Half-bath updates

Posted by Farmgirl on February 21, 2009  |  3 Comments

Here are a few photos of my progress. Looks pretty sad and hideous doesn’t it? Just you wait … I can see it in my head already. Ideally, I’d love to have new drywall installed; however, that’s pushing my luck with the man of the house and quite frankly, it’s too much of a mess for such a tiny space. I’m compromising … beadboard. Farm boy is on his way to get some as I type.

See those nasty old, red tiles? And please allow me to mention that the toilet seat is completely clean … what you see is actually purple passion fingernail polish. Don’t ask.

Except for the one bolt that stuck like the dickens, I disassembled the toilet on my own. Farm boy kindly carried it to a temporary location.

Side note: The writing’s on the wall at our house … see that, there? Every time we’ve remodeled something in this house and our previous home, we make a little note of it. A hundred years from now, when the next inhabitants decide to change my style because it’s out of date or their son overflowed the toilet, they’ll find my note and realize they are not alone! Hmmm. Maybe I’ll haunt the house a hundred years from now. Sorry … back to my post.

Ladies, friends, countrymen … if you have never removed a toilet from its current location, you may not have heard of a wax ring. New, it’s probably not at all disgusting. When you must remove an old one, however, I recommend plastic gloves and a sturdy constitution. You must scrape and pry all of the old wax and its rubber ring from around the top of the pipe which connects to your toilet. Then you must stuff a rag or something down the hole until you are ready to put the toilet in place. Enough said.

The tiling will start soon, shouldn’t take long. The space is about 5′ x 6′. Here’s a sampling of the tile. I just love the earthy, natural colors!

And of course I will have plenty of help! I’m sorry, I can’t resist throwing this one in … he’s just such a squirt!

I did splurge on one thing. As it turned out, the old faucet and its rusty, corroded parts needed replaced anyway, so it wasn’t a splurge after all! Isn’t it luscious?

I’ll post more as progress continues. Wish me luck!

When you want something done …

Posted by Farmgirl on February 20, 2009  |  No Comments

… you know the rest of THAT statement!

I just finished gutting my bathroom. Friday nights are super-entertaining around here, let me tell ya!

My son recently discovered he can create his own Niagara Falls by stuffing the entire roll of toilet paper down the hole and then flushing. And he has done so about three times in the downstairs half bath. I do keep my eyes on him, really.

Secretly, I rejoiced. Time to replace the old, ugly flooring! The space is very small, just room enough for the toilet and sink. I chose some budget-friendly, six-inch multi-toned slate tiles from Lowes. They were about 96 cents each. Hey, all those hours tuned into HGTV have finally paid off. I know how to tile my floor!

Tonight I began the prep work. First, turned off the water, removed the sink and took out the vanity. Then I turned off the toilet and to my dismay, I did have to ask the farm boy for help. I couldn’t get the nut off the one bolt. He was nice enough to move the toilet out of the room for me, too. Thanks, muscle man.

I took the door off its hinges. I removed all of the trim boards and window frame. I ripped up the carpet, padding and even those darned tack strips which, by the way, are vicious! I pulled off the funky wall board that lined the area behind the sink. And now … now I sit here sharing the wondrous tale with you all, slurping Diet Coke and grinning.

I must admit, I’m proud of myself. Ladies! You can do anything you set your mind to do. And now that I know how to remove the sink and toilet — and yes, that hideous wax ring under the toilet — I may even conquer the upstairs bathroom one day.

I’ll show you some photos in a day or so. Cross your fingers … I’m planning to tile the floor tomorrow and if I beg, maybe farm boy will cut the beadboard for the wall. I’m not good with measuring tapes and table saws (or maybe it’s another kind of saw, how should I know? I once trimmed my trees with a hack saw because I couldn’t find the limb saw. Hey! It worked!)

Goodbye and good night!
Farmgirl

Come see us on March 19

Posted by Farmgirl on February 19, 2009  |  4 Comments

FARMGIRL FINDS WILL REOPEN MARCH 19!
Take a leisurely drive through Carroll County’s rolling hills to
Tuckaway Farm, and discover primitive finds and attic treasures!

Regular Hours: Thursday-Friday-Saturday, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Sign for my times

Posted by Farmgirl on February 19, 2009  |  No Comments

It snowed. Hallelujah! — a couple inches of new white stuff to cover secrets that were suddenly exposed during last week’s thaw. Property that seemed so pristine in its blanket of white was suddenly cluttered with bright, plastic sleds, a forlorn hat and mittens from the snowman, stray lead rope that someone trailed from the barn and then dropped by the pine tree. The dog pilfered a milk jug from the garbage can. Empty feed bags, pop cans and a spoon from my kitchen. Dump trucks in the sandbox.

And why are there hundreds of muddy boots scattered on my back porch? Ahh. I remember now. I have children. And a husband. 

They have endless outdoor ambitions and boots for every endeavor. Snow boots; winter barn boots; rubber barn boots; rain boots; hiking boots; cowboy boots; tennis shoes and flip-flops … boots for woodcutting; for scraping the feedlot and bedding the steers; every day and heavy snow boots; hunting boots; cowboy boots; and of course, rubber boots that will carry Farm Boy safely to the ark when the next flood comes.

I have a plan … a storage bench with four sections and hinged lids. In it they will stuff their multi-million pairs of boots and shoes and cease abusing my valuable back door real estate. I won’t even mention their dirty, muddy and often stinky, barn clothes.

And I’m going to get one of these — it excuses everything quite effectively:

Murphy’s Law and bathing bliss

Posted by Farmgirl on February 18, 2009  |  No Comments

Do not ever say to your husband, boyfriend, significant other, sister, mother, friend or coworker: “You know, it’s almost March and we have managed to avoid getting sick. I mean, the kids had the sniffles one time back in November, but that’s all. We have been so lucky.”

You know what happened next.

I got the flu. Usually if I succumb to a bug, it’s the gut-wrenching miserable kind. On a possibly positive note, I have the other type … tight chest, aches, pains, can’t breathe, dry hack kind of flu that a flu shot would have prevented (so they say). It’s miserable. In case you didn’t know, mommies are not allowed to fall ill. There’s this unspoken rule about it. So while the terrible two-fer was down for a nap and my other two offspring dutifully practiced their spelling words, I snuck away. I took a shower.  A very long shower. A very, very, very long hot and steamy shower that made me feel quite a bit better. It’s best not to look at the clock when you plan on a long shower, because then you cannot be held accountable for the amount of time you spent flushing water down the drain. Note: If we had to pay for water out here, I would have settled for a long, hot and steamy sponge bath. Promise. 

Speaking of baths … I want one of those too. Just like this … from Restoration Hardware … in my dreams.

There is only one tub in this house. The last time the kids used it, water ran through the dining room ceiling. Obviously we haven’t used it since then … waiting on farm boy to pull out his plumbing repertoire and fix the problem. Apparently it takes a good deal of consideration before cutting a hole in the ceiling and assessing the damage. So much consideration, that five months have passed and he’s STILL considering. Yes, you heard me. The three females in this house have had to give up bathing all winter long. And it’s something we truly enjoy doing. A nice hot bubble bath can cure the doldrums, the crankies, the grouchies and the not-ready-for-bed-syndrome. We have been known to grab a towel and sneak away to grandma’s for a bath on occasion. We have even been known to complain profusely about the lack of bathing opportunities in this house.

It doesn’t matter. Most men have the same opinion of tubs: “Why would you want to sit in your own filth?” They just don’t get it. A tub isn’t for washing. It’s for relaxing. If you have a tub and a box of Calgon or Strawberry Shortcake bubble bath or even a bottle of Dawn … enjoy. I envy you.

Cheesy Pecan Quesadillas

Posted by Farmgirl on February 14, 2009  |  No Comments

With only three ingredients, these tasty treats are quick and easy!

Ingredients: flour tortillas, Havarti cheese, pecans

(Makes two quesadillas)

Spread 1/2 cup chopped pecans in a single layer on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Place in the oven and broil on high for 1-2 minutes or until pecans start to turn brown. Remove tray from the oven and set aside to cool.
TIP: Leave the oven door open when toasting the pecans … otherwise you might walk away and forget …  trust me, the smell of blackened pecans is not pleasant!

Grab your grater and shred 1/2 cup of Havarti cheese into a bowl.

Time to assemble!

Cover a flour tortilla with shredded Havarti, leaving about a 1/2-inch edge. Top with chopped, toasted pecans. Now put a lid on it! (another tortilla of course).

This recipe makes about two quesadillas, using four tortillas.

Spray a non-stick skillet with cooking spray. Heat to medium. Place quesadilla in pan. Heat 1-2 minutes or until side is slightly browned. Flip and repeat. Slide it out onto a cutting board. Using a knife or a pizza cutter, slice diagonally.

Place triangles on a platter and serve warm.

Don’t like Havarti? Try smoked gouda or even blue cheese.

You could also top the cheese with sliced pears and pecans. Yummy!

ENJOY!