Road Trip, part 1

Posted by Farmgirl on April 30, 2009  |  No Comments

My girls and I left Ohio last Wednesday on a girls-only road trip. It was a fun-filled adventure brimming with new experiences. We trekked through a cave 125 feet below the earth’s surface. We played with kangaroos. Photographed a dingo. Spent time in an aviary and marveled at birds landing on our heads, shoulders, arms and hands.

We groaned during a traffic jam and lamented our love for the wide open winding roads of home. We marveled at the lush, green leaves on the trees “down south” — and stretched and frolicked in the 90-degree sunshine.

Our only scheduled item: make it to Nashville by Saturday.

We spent Wednesday night in a Ramada across from the Kentucky Speedway (it was incredibly clean, the folks were very friendly and I highly recommend it!). The girls were so excited — we usually camp on our vacations. 

A wigwam welcomed us on Thursday night. I wouldn’t call Wigwam City deluxe accommodations, but these concrete 50s-era historially registered ”motels” were clean and memorable. And only slightly creepy.

My daughters thought they were perfect. I fell asleep redorating the interiors and exteriors in my mind.  Minor landscaping, update the playground, fresh paint and new bedding would improve things immensely …  but I digress from telling about the scary part.

I was a bit alarmed when I awoke to strange noises at 1:30 a.m. “Creeeeeaak, creeeaaak … laughter … creeeaaak.”

A person or persons were using the swingset a mere 15-20 yards from my wigwam’s front door — in the dead of night. I sat in the dark, listening intently until I heard a shuffling sound that meant they were leaving.

I keep telling myself it was the ghost of wigwam inhabitants past and not some mass-murdering serial killer contemplating his next victim. (I was a bit dramatic alone with my offspring in a wigwam without my chief to protect me!)

Before retiring for the night in our cute and creepy wigwam, we went to a movie. I must admit: I have never watched Hannah Montana. My daughters don’t watch Hannah Montana, though somehow they know who and what she is. We saw the movie and surprisingly to me, it was really good. It was clean, wholesome and innocent. I didn’t notice any swear words. Young love was very innocent and sweet, minus inuendo. And … the girls and I have been singing Hoedown Throwdown for a week.

Stay tuned for the next installment of Road Trip ‘09!

Antiques shopping tips

Posted by Farmgirl on April 30, 2009  |  1 Comment

 

 

 5 Hints for Savvy Antiques Shopping

Score better deals and build better collections with these expert tips for making the most of your next antiquing excursion.

Parkesburg, Pennsylvania, primitives lover and antiques dealer Holly Pfanders, whose home is featured in the January 2009 issue of Country Sampler, believes that now is a great time to start buying antiques or add to your collections. In this economy, she says, you don’t have to be an expert to get a good deal. Here are five tips to help you get started:

1. Set a budget. If there is a certain item you want and you have a set budget, it pays to be patient. “I have found more than one thing that way,” says Holly, noting that the unique pie safe in her kitchen was such a piece. She passed up several more-expensive options before finding the right one. “I was willing to wait until I found it at a price I could afford.”

2. Use your imagination. Even if a piece has some damage, you may be able to repurpose it into something else by pruning the broken parts or painting over unwanted marks. For example, if you find a dining table that has damaged legs, Holly says, “Don’t dismiss it, just think of trimming its legs down and using it as a coffee table.”

3. Look off the beaten path. Dealers sometimes end up with things they don’t usually carry, and you may be able to get a bargain because they are eager to part with an item. “Just pop your head in the door, even if it seems like the place carries a different style of antiques than what you’re looking for,” Holly says. She once got a great deal on an 18th-century Perry County, Pennsylvania, two-door cupboard that a glassware dealer was using for display. “It was just utilitarian to him,” she explains.

4. Get educated. There are a lot of reproduction items out there with a primitive look. If you’re after the real thing or want to make sure you get what you’re paying for, Holly recommends educating yourself by reading books or collector’s guides and perhaps even visiting a museum for a firsthand look. Examine primitive furniture for signs of wear. “It should be in logical places-—authentic, not contrived,” Holly says.

5. Be inquisitive. Reputable dealers should be willing to share their knowledge about their wares. Most will label an item indicating whether it is reproduction or has other than an original finish. “Don’t be afraid to ask, ‘Can you tell me what you know about this piece?’ ” Holly advises.

Written by Lisa Sloan
Photographed by Franklin & Esther Schmidt

Pressures and one-liners

Posted by Farmgirl on April 19, 2009  |  2 Comments

Every Sunday evening, I gather my three kids and the hubby and drag them to my parents’ house where we join my siblings and their broods for supper. It’s a crazy, sometimes painful, always rip-roarin’ good time.

It’s crazy. I already said that, but trust me … it’s worth mentioning again.

One-liners
In addition to jokes and wild stories and comparing latest exploits, it’s also become tradition to sport our newest T-shirts. We’re a family of wordsmiths, apparently, and love a good line.

Personally, I’ve worn T-shirts that say: I value suggestions as long as they are my own and I like to let my mind wander, but it never comes back! and of course, Farmgirl. My favorite was a black T-shirt I wore while pregnant: F.B.I. Fabulous Baby Inside. Those are mild.

Today my brother’s T-shirt showcased a large male cow. In bold letters it said, BULL SHIRT! He also likes the one with short sleeves that says Welcome to the Gun Show. Arrows point to his biceps.

My husband, who herded kids after supper, wore a shirt appropriately adorned with, Wildlife Management Team. He also favors his INFIDEL shirt with an advertisement for U.S. Tactical Supply on the back. My mom got him a Yes, Dear! T-shirt for Christmas.

Then there’s my brother-in-law. He proudly sports shirts that say things like, Free Insults - come get yours! and I’m outta bed and dressed, what more do you want? and Vegetables are not food. Vegetables are what food eat.

You get the picture … basically, we’re a bunch of smarty pants people.

Fun factor
We are also easily amused. Do you know what we did for entertainment after supper? Someone started talking about high blood pressure.

My mother, in her infinite fast-approaching dementia-induced wisdom, pulled out her blood pressure monitor. She checked everyone. Of course we were all too high—who wouldn’t be ready to explode in such a chaos of kids, grandmas feeding said kids candy and sibling rivalry. Add in a healthy dose of high decibel conversation, noisy toys and bouts of uncontrollable laughter, and we’re all ready to combust.

After nurse grandma diagnosed everyone with high blood pressure, we sat around meditating and practicing our deep breathing exercises, trying to lower our pressures to normal.

Yes, really. That’s how we spent the evening. Trying to outdo each other’s blood pressure readings.

Ahhh, nothin’ like Sunday with the family.

House hunting

Posted by Farmgirl on April 19, 2009  |  2 Comments

I love virtual house hunting. I get a kick out of perusing realtor Web sites so I can look inside other people’s homes. You’d be surprised at the great decorating tips you can uncover … the inspiration you may find.

There are perils to such a voyeuristic hobby, however. Like the rare occasion you see the next house of your dreams … knowing full well it will never, ever in a million years be your house. That’s happened to me a couple of times. I get my fix visiting the online photo galleries and then … boom. The links no longer work, which means someone bought my next dream house.

I couldn’t help but appreciate THIS house and I wanted to share it with all of my fellow antique lovers. This home is for sale in Hartville. If you’re looking for a primitive-style dwelling in Northeast Ohio with lots of history under its belt, this may be the house for you.

Someone put a great deal of time, love and care into this house. I wonder why it’s for sale … it makes me a little sad for the current owners. Anyway, enjoy these photos. I did! Maybe you’ll even uncover a bit of inspiration to use in your own home. And hopefully the homeowners of this house won’t mind … after all, maybe one of you will fall in love!

P.S. This is just a sampling of the photos. To see all photos of this house, click on the link above.

The end!

Boy … oh boy!

Posted by Farmgirl on April 18, 2009  |  No Comments

I could say a lot about this photo … my porch floor needs a new coat of paint or I really need to scrub doggie slobber off of my back door or my son’s hat is too big and his ears look like Dumbo’s or is it really warm enough for bare feet in April or why is he eating chocolate pudding in the middle of the afternoon when supper is not far away …

Or I could simply say that on a 75-degree Saturday in April, my little hillbilly farm boy took a break from his sandbox for a snack … and there’s nothin’ better than chocolate puddin’ and your favorite hat when you’re almost three.

Because when it comes down to it, all a hillbilly farm boy needs is a good hat to keep the sun out of his eyes and an adoring Momma who will open the pudding snack he stole from the cupboard when no one was looking.

“Boy, oh boy, it’s good to be me.”

It’s a bug’s world!

Posted by Farmgirl on April 14, 2009  |  2 Comments

The Ohio Agricultural Research and Development Center is the research arm of The Ohio State University’s College of Food, Agricultural, and Environmental Sciences.

Today we participated in OARDC’s fabulous program for school-aged kids, A Bug’s World. Once a year, more than 1,200 students descend on the Wooster campus for an opportunity to learn the importance of insects in our world.

The adventure began with bee lessons. The kids were challenged to take paper and pencil on their next shopping trip and write down all of the items they see with honey in the name. Being diligent little listmakers, Snicker and Doodle are now eager for a jaunt to the grocery store.

They had a chance to view a colony of bees. They identified the queen and the drones. They even listened to the buzz of the hive.

It takes about 21 days for a bee to grow, about 16 days for a queen bee. Did you know if a human baby ate at a rate equal to a baby honeybee, the human would be the size of an elephant in five days? Whew!

The Bug Guy taught us about collecting and preserving insects. The girls have already made a to-buy list: pins, display boxes, moth balls, labels.

Do you know the most humane way to kill a bug for preservation? Place it in a small dish (envelope for butterflies) and put it in the freezer. And I can see it now … some sunny day in July I will open the freezer for a popsicle and be buried in an avalanche of dung beetles and mealworms.

Last stop of the day: Bug Zoo. This is hands-on entomological entertainment.

Everyone had an opportunity to hold mealworms and milkweed beetles and hissing cockroaches from Madagascar. Not everyone accepted the opportunity, but it was offered.

Incidentally, only the female Madagascar Hissing Cockroaches hiss. As Farm Guy pointed out, “You can always tell a woman by her hiss.”

Uh-huh. And the male cockroaches have horns on their head. So what’s that tell ya?

Did you know giant millipedes do not have a thousand legs? The Bug Lady said they have about 120 legs. Hmmm.

How many legs does a centipede have? Well, some have 100 legs, others more. Many have as few as 30. Those tricky scientists … they like to keep us guessing.

Wow. These are big and scary giant millipedes.

Come on … get a little closer to the big and scary giant millipede.

If Mom is willing to hold a big and scary giant millipede without fear of its one thousand 120 legs, you can too.

This is Rosie. She’s a Chilean Rose-haired tarantula. We were first introduced about 10 years ago. Rosie and I had a love-hate relationship. I loved to to freak out tour groups and school kids by letting her crawl up my arm … but I hated it when she crawled up my arm.

According to The Bug Lady, Rosie is no longer crawling up the arms of witless public relations coordinators. She’s 20 years old and retired to a cozy home with rocks and hiding spots and lots of fresh food. She looks quite happy in her dwelling.

It was good to see ya, Rosie—it’s been a long time. I’m glad we were friends.

I got hammered

Posted by Farmgirl on April 13, 2009  |  2 Comments

One day I decided I needed copper lights on my front porch. My logical husband said,

“We have perfectly fine porch lights. We do not need new porch lights.”

“Yes, dear, but you know that show where they update the outside of people’s homes? The designer installed new copper lights and they looked so darned nice! It completely transformed the look of the whole house!”

He shook his head no, but my mind was made up—my house needed copper porch lights!

I went to the home improvement store to research my options … and there my little fantasy came to an abrupt end.

It may take a price tag to make me listen to reason, but I do come around to logic eventually. Copper, as I’m sure you already know, is not cheap.

Was I disappointed? Absolutely.

Was I thwarted? Momentarily.

I meandered to the paint section to drown my sorrows in vibrant color … and there, in aisle seven, I had an epiphany.

It will go down in the history books as one of the greatest discoveries of my 21st century.

Did you know you can buy hammered copper in a can?

You can! They also have hammered bronze and plain bronze and wrought iron. For $7.87 plus tax, I would have my copper porch lights.

 Unfortunately, I did not take a photo of my old porch lights, pre-copperizing. Just imagine them black, dusty and spotted with smashed gnats and cobwebs. Then whip out a can of hammered copper spray paint (or wrought iron or hammered bronze) and this is the result.

Isn’t that cool? I am so excited! Now I want copper door knobs and light switches and drawer pulls and a copper stove hood. Don’t worry, I will not spray paint my stove hood, though I’m fairly confident it would look like real hammered copper. I’m also confident that would be the final straw for the man of the house.

The moral of this story?

I got hammered copper lights, just like I wanted, thanks to a little luck, a dream that wouldn’t die and $7.87 plus tax. I shared my good fortune with the man of the house.

“See my new copper lights, honey? When you buy a pair they’re cheaper, so I only paid $468!”

He is used to my whims, and it’s not often I shock him speechless. This did it. In a panic, before he could have another heart attack, I quickly explained the situation.

” … and so we have two new copper porch lights for $7.87 plus tax.”

Now that’s the kind of upgrade he can appreciate!

P.S. Notice the cardboard under my light? It looks like copper and it’s cardboard. Hmmm. Imagine a nice piece of birch plywood, edges rounded and sanded, spray painted with this miracle solution. Then imagine a four-legged stand constructed of old barn siding. Hmmm. A copper side table by the time the paint dries.

Holy Moses! I love a good discovery!

Nosey, aren’t ya?

Posted by Farmgirl on April 11, 2009  |  No Comments

Did you know I can speak bovine?

These two are saying,
“The grass really is greener on the other side of this fence …
we double-dog-triple-cow dare you to open the gate and we’ll prove it.”

Crayola cupcakes

Posted by Farmgirl on April 10, 2009  |  No Comments

If you have kids, chances are there’s a can or box of broken, forlorn crayons stashed somewhere in your home. It seems we’re always buying new Crayolas—my kids are coloring machines and my son enjoys breaking them in two.

As a person who likes to keep her crayons organized and immaculate, his habits are extemely irritating! Here’s a cool little trick that prevents waste and creates a new realm of coloring possibilities.

First, divide broken crayons by color.

Remove paper wrappers.

Place two cupcake papers in each muffin tin.
Break crayons into tiny pieces and then fill cups.
Separate by color or mix-n-match for cool design schemes—
the green and yellow cup belongs to my John Deere fan.

Place crayola “muffins” in a 350 degree oven until melted, about 10 minutes.
Remove from heat and allow to cool. Then pop your cups out of the pan, peel away
wrappers and serve … to your kids who will undoubtedly thrill to the new colors.

You might want to warn them, though: these are NOT new, multi-colored Reese’s Cups.
They are fun, intriguing and surprisingly easy to grasp for younger kids.

And the winners are …

Posted by Farmgirl on April 10, 2009  |  30 Comments

Thanks for entering the NAMITS Game Giveaway. I enjoyed reading your comments and picked up a few new ideas for entertaining my own kids!

The winners are:

Ashley
julie crawford

Ladies, I have sent you a confirmation e-mail. Please reply with your mailing address and your new NAMITS Games will be sent! Thanks for playing!

________________________________ 

Have you ever played 20 questions? I’m impatient—I much prefer the game of five questions.

1. What’s roughly the size of several credit cards?
2. What can fit in you wallet, pocket or on a key chain?
3. What will save your life if you’re traveling with kids?
4. What can keep said kids occupied for hours?
5. What can be distributed to all of your kids so no one has to share?

NAMITS®
The Game of Think

These cute little tear-proof cards are brimming with thought-provoking entertainment. I’ve used them in waiting rooms and on long drives; in church and (don’t tell anyone) once for punishment!

To play, look at the first card in the section, then choose a word from the cards that follow to make a NAMITS question. Your kids—or you if you’re bored—must then think of all possible answers. Name them aloud, write them down or time the answers at group game night.

Namits is a tiny little tool with great potential. I highly recommend it to parents, grandparents and game buffs.

GIVEAWAY ALERT!

I will give away two Namits games on Friday, April 17. To enter, leave a comment describing how YOU occupy your kids in sticky situations. Winners will be chosen at random. One entry per person please!

If you prefer to purchase your own set, they are available at http://www.namits.com.

Good luck!