Our Homeschooling Story, part three
I want to see this, experience this. I want to giggle at the innocence of a boy in a clown wig reading a book. I’m selfish, see. I want my children’s moments. I want their hearts and minds and laughter and idiosyncrasies — at my disposal and for my pleasure. I’m fully aware that some day they will leave. They will be strong-willed, independent and determined adults bent on a long and winding road. I’ll be the sagging, possibly sobbing mama standing on the porch waving goodbye and wishing them well. When that time comes I will hug them hard and kiss them pink.
But now, in these early years, I want what’s mine in the time I’m given.
It doesn’t come easily. There are logistics involved and sacrifices to be made. The journey began when we created our first tiny human. She was precious and petite and intent. Now she’s long and lean, and aims to please with a brilliant smile and a kindly attitude. She’s stubborn and highly opinionated, but quiet and gentle in her approach.
After her birth we spent three months together. Then I went back to work. I survived one day without her before coming home to our family forever. It wasn’t easy. Going from two incomes to one is a struggle and a game-changer — but so is parenthood. We made our way and we prayed without ceasing. Soon an employment opportunity came for me, from home.
That was 13 years and three kids ago. I now work in the office one day, via computer the rest of the week. It is a job I love, employment I treasure, and a blessing that has eased us through babies and my husband’s heart attack. I believe it is divine intervention. If ever I start to lose sight of my goals (and it happens), I need only look at the eyes of my family to see that my job, this gift of at-home employment, comes from God. It allows me to be a mostly stay-at-home, homeschooling mom and that is the job I cherish most of all. Sometimes I get a little intense — about work and about mothering — because the stakes are high and one is dependent upon the other.
You will find a way. It may seem impossible, right now, but you will find a solution to your dilemmas if homeschooling is what you know in your heart to be right for you and your family. My best advice? Remember to look up — always and for any reason under sun or cover of night.
Ask. Seek. Knock.
Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find;
knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who
asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who
knocks it will be opened. — Matthew 7:7-8
Why do we educate our children at home? Because we love God and we love our children, and it’s what he saw fit to have us do. Making a U-turn is always stressful. Changing course usually happens under duress. Finding your way in the vast, wide open wilderness? It is amazing, terrifying, heart-wrenching and burdened with more joy than I ever could have imagined.